Pressure to be me?

Finally I was happy. I met dj at a through my sister I knew that they had some kind of thing but I was so young I didn’t know what. dj was 4 to 5 years older then me and I was only 12 when I met him. Well my sister never went out with him and she moved so I never got to see him again. Until one night my friend had a party it was my first party of my freshman year I was so exited but I didn’t know how it would feel to go to a high school party I got dressed and went, and that’s when I saw dj he looked so good and I had to get with him we talked and I flirted and we had a good time then he asked me if I would come over and braid his hair I said sure and we exchanged numbers. I was so happy all I could talk about was dj. dj this and dj that. well the next night I went and stayed at my friend Kim’s house and we chilled it was me her and my ex best friend Clarisse they wanted to invite some guys over and I had never done anything like that but I wanted to be bad so I agreed and they were making all the arrangements when one of the boys on the phone named Jordan asked me if I could have sex with him I was so scared and all my friends had already done it so I joked around and was like you have to ask dj if that would be ok so I called dj on three way and he was like hell no are you crazy if you even touch her I will hurt you I felt amazing I had actually had huys fighting over me well Jordan hung up I guess he was mad and dj came over we laughed and hung out till like 3 he was so tired that Kim’s mom let him stay the night well that morning I went in to wake him up and we got to talking I laid under the covers with him and then he started to touch me in the wrong places I was so scared I liked him but I still didn’t know what to do after that day me and dj started talking even though he was 18 and I was 14 I didn’t care he would come over my house every day and he would just do the sweetest things for me then one night I went over to his house with my friend Ashley cause she was going out with his brother randy well everyone else had started having sex but us and we were in the living room watching television then he started kissing my neck and hugging me I was like wow I think I’m about to do this well I didn’t want my first time to be on a couch I’m old fission I prefer the bed well he made his brother get out of the room they shared together and then well you know. It hurt so bad and it wasn’t even being enjoyed I hated it but that’s is the story of how I met my first love and how I lost my virginity.